It's Okay to Cry...

I have a family that exemplifies strength... I mean downright resilience! Things happen; you pick yourself up, deal with it, overcome it, and come out stronger for the lesson you've learned. That's just how they roll! I was taught that there's very little room for crying in this series of actions. I was told things like, "crying isn't going to solve the problem." And that's true, crying does not solve problems, but why do we put such a negative connotation on the act of crying anyway? Why do we stigmatize the display of emotion as weakness? It feels like this idea upheld by our traditional families that we should "control" our emotions, is actually meant for us to "suppress" our emotions. I don't think that's necessary, nor do I find it healthy.

Benefits of Crying:

Yes, crying actually does have it's advantages. I'll just list a few.

• helps you self-soothe

• restores emotional balance

• improves mood

• can relieve pain

• detoxes eyes

• enhances sleep

When confronting emotions, I think it's important to acknowledge what you're feeling, so you can determine how you want to deal. Everyone has their own personal way to process their feelings, and in some situations, my natural inclination is to cry when addressing particular sentiments. It took me a such a long while to accept that. It's okay that I need to cry sometimes, and that doesn't make me weak. While I understand that it's important to exude strength, be a bold leader and be a formidable example within your circle, family or community, I also find strength in being transparent about your humanity. If I want to be a leader that is admirable, sure, I need to be strong, smart and executive, but I also need to be relatable and caring so that I can know how to best help those that I serve. So, if I need a private moment or two to allow myself to let it all out, I have to remind myself that it's perfectly fine, and it might actually make me more qualified to carry out my calling to encourage others. It means I've been in your shoes, I feel what you feel, so you can feel comfortable connecting to me. And I love that!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not endorsing pity parties or encouraging everyone to cry all the time. I'm just sharing my sentiments that it's more than fine to deal with your feelings in a healthy, emotional manner. If that works for you, never feel guilty about it. So, although it may be true that crying won't solve any problems, I'd like to add a caveat; ONLY crying won't solve any problems. I'm still capable of following my family's example. Life happens, I can express my frustrations....in whatever form they come, and that may entail crying, then I can make the necessary moves to begin finding solutions. Sometimes, I am a crier, and it may take me a minute to pull myself together, but I do it. I do pull myself together! I wipe my own tears. I accept the reality of the moment, I make a plan, then I execute and press on...there's nothing weak about that. If you don't stay down when you're knocked down, if you muster up the gumption to get up again, if you find a way to put one foot in the front of the other after you've stumbled, you're already stronger than you know.